Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Here's the story about the 1:45 HOUR U-TURN EXPRESSWAY Part DEUX

.........part numero UNO continues from here

Next we headed across the street to chill at The Curves. We had our blissful cupcakes and choco ice blended. What can I say? YUMYUMYUM!!! After a long tiring squeezing through people and line queuing this is the remedy to all evils. We spent almost an hour there before we decided that it's finally time to hit the highway. We snap, sip, gulp, flip, chat, flap, clap........ then off we went. Looking for the Sungai Buloh Burger King coz Joanna promised her parents to pack them back one each. The jayboy blindly followed the signs with one exhausted looking live on the backseat that fell asleep the very minute we got back on the road and one more chaboh on the passenger seat that wakes up on and off to check back on him. We took the Damansara exit instead of the usual highway going all th way back to the city coz we didn't want to endure the traffic we just went through not too many hours ago. Guess what?!!! *@!!*&*(%$!~% we phucking got lost in some kampung looking road with misleading signs that are supposed to take us back to the highway heading to Ipoh/KL. We were in Kuala freaking Selangor or were we in Sungai Buloh kampung coz we saw signs that say Sungai Buloh Penjara hohohohooooo!!!

In the midst of all these detours Joanna finally woke up feeling groggy. She asked, "Where the HECK are we?!!!" What were we suppose to say? Like god knows man! The next thing we know we finally found a small uneven road that brought us back out to Gutherie Highway. What is a Gutherie wei? But it sure seems like we are on the right track till we reached a toll. It's the bloody toll entering KL from the south. Oh-my-freaking-god we took the highway that was leading us to Johor Bahru. So we asked the toll attendant how far are we from the Sungai Buloh exit knowing that we are on the wrong side of the highway. She pointed us to the almost correct path that got the driver so confused("Sg, Buloh belum sampai lagi, selepas Rawang.") coz he was thinking looking at the high from their other approaching side. Phew we finally got to Sg. Buloh rest stop but knowing that we're on the wrong side of the highway and if we don't take a u-turn we can't get back to our journey home. We were THIS close to get to Burger King, all we needed to do now was get out of the car walk past A&W and tadaaaaa we are there. Drove past it stopped at the petrol station and I went down to asked the cashier where do we u-turn to get back to the other side of the highway. Ok! I got 2 very different answers: First, the cashier said: "Selepas tol boleh pusing balik." Then came the store manager I guess, he came out from the store room saying: "Mesti exit balik Damansara dulu." I didn't know which was the right one so being a messenger I delivered the message la. Really alamak okay if we have to go all the way back to Damansara coz it's phucking far away from where we were. When we got to the toll, the actual Sungai Buloh Plus Highway toll which consist of an amazing stretch of 20 lanes.

Paid the toll then asked the toll person again, where is the bloody U-TURN, she was like, "Sana, tengah-tengah sana boleh u-turn." We were so alert looking for it coz it was really when she said "tengah-tengah sana", goddamnit! she was right. There was actually a tiny opening in between the stretch of 20 lanes for a U-TURN. We were on the last lane daringly cut through 10 frigging lanes to get to the center. This is where Joanna's infamous line "I'll cover" using my mini boxing gloves on a stick cum neck massager comes in. She randomly swooshed that out from the back seat pocket wound down the window and flagged cars down letting them know the suuuuuppaaaahhhh MyVi is gonna do the stunt of cutting through from lane 10 to lane 1 to get to the middle. And then the process repeat coz we had to get to the lane at the very end for the other side of the highway too as the 'Lorong Tunai' is at the very end. Gosh gosh gish gush mush lush bush aaAAaaahHHHhh I was screaming "FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! SHITTTTTT THERE'S A CAR COMIIIIIINNNGGGGG ON THE LEFT NOOOOOOOO!!!!!" The Jayster sorta had that look that he was gonna pee in his pants on his face and LOL cold sweat was running down his forehead.
Pheewwww!!! We survived thank god! Isn't it obvious I'm now here telling you what actually happened. Mission accomplished when we finally got to the Restoran Jejantas Sg. Buloh on the correct side of the highway. Jo bought he desired BKs plus some other side orders and we got another burger to share to ease the thumping heart plus a yummylicious BK ice-cream cone. We were occupying the best seats in the house eagerly catching our movie: The Federal Highway at BK. Superb view from our spot, comfy seats with good snacks LOL

Jangejo's Journey to the Center or BK and Federal

The ratings for THIS entire movie/journey on the highway is as stated as below together with the genre and budget of the film.

And the actors are:

Joanna Kwan Shyu Chi

Angelene Tang Mei Yee

Sanjay Subramaniam

aka the Jangejos!!!

Lastly, presenting to you the STAR of the entire journey. We wouldn't have gotten anywhere without it. MyWHEEEEEEEE!!!

We all finally got home just a little past midnight. What a trip?! It took us half a day 12 HOURS for a usual 4 hours drive home. Shucks but it's priceless. Try it yourself especially the 20 lanes stunt.

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